Excerpt from Chapter 5
On my way home, I felt calm and content. Not even that cunt of a parent could shake my indifferent euphoria. I made it to the house, I
was only a half an hour late, so I was in no real trouble. The beast was outside with a friend visiting and Eric was in the kitchen looking
through the refrigerator.
“Hey, can you hand me a water?” I asked.
“Yeah sure,” Eric said before tossing me a bottle. “Where have you been? It took you this long to walk from school?”
“I had some things to think about before getting here and I lost track of time. Where’s Father?”
“He called mom saying he will work late today. I heard something that would interest you.”
“What would that be?” I asked as I leaned back against the counter and opened my water.
“I heard that you’ve been treating Bethany like crap, I think she likes you and you really need to downplay how you act around Mrs. Dome, there are some rumors going around.” Eric stated bluntly.
“When did you speak to her?” I asked curiously.
“I was talking to Bethany after school since you didn’t come out I went in and happen to see Bethany by the entrance.”
“And you guys talked about Mrs. Dome?”
“She said that there were rumors and she asked if I knew anything about that and if they were true.” Eric remarked.
“I heard how you treated her and mom heard too, so you’re probably in trouble for that as well. Just to give you heads up!”
“Shit! I am in trouble not even the devil can argue my way out of this one!”
“How are you going to handle all of this?” Eric added.
“I hope that the school has more scruples than the drones that inhabit the school. As for Bethany, I can’t imagine her liking me or any guy in any way, I haven’t decided on what to do about her yet…In the end don’t I always have a plan?”
“She is expecting you to apologize to her.”
“Well I better get this over with; I’ll catch you later then.” I replied then walked outside where the Beast was had been.
“Hi son,” the Beast stated. “It’s about time you got home.”
“I was here; I was inside talking to Eric all this time.”
I knew that due to her company, she would keep the illusion of a good family, and would not drill me about being late or to check my time.
“Very well,” the Beast replied, a hint of contempt in her voice. “Come over here and greet Margaret, this is my oldest son Alexander.”
“Nice to meet you.” Margaret said.
“You know son, Margaret and I have been friends for twenty-three years. Oh, by the way, you need to give that girl Bethany an apology. I don’t know what you did, but you sent her home upset.”
“I am heading that way now.”
She nodded her head while she continued talking to Margaret. I walked through the back field and passed by the huge rock from the
evening before and who should I find sitting down, but her. I slowed my pace trying to figure out what to say to her. Soon I walked over
and greeted her.
“Hey Bethany, I did not expect to see you here.”
“What do you want?” Bethany snapped. “Did you come here to belittle me some more?”
I climbed the rock to join her.
“About that, I was being honest, and you had it coming. I figured you would appreciate honesty. I can treat you the same way as I do with others and lie! Would you prefer this instead?”
“I didn’t know, I’m sorry. I guess I am used to people manipulating or lying to me so much that it’s jaded my perspective on people who
“It’s okay, you have a messed up family, and so do I.”
“My parents are so wrapped into their own affairs that they are not aware that I even exist. How about you?”
“I look forward to have at least one day without the Beast in my business or in my life stirring problems as she does. My father is busy,
but occasionally he does his parenting. He gives me room to live my life not like the Beast.”
“I’m sorry, who is the Beast?”
I was amazed and shocked I called her that out loud.
“That is mother; I refer to her as Beast, but I ask don’t ever say that in front of my brother. He has a closer relationship with her than I do. I hate her and wish her to die.”
Bethany recoiled from my remark, “So I think my profile of you may have merit after all,” then she laughed and continued, “I hate my
mother in how she constantly has to analyze everything about me, so I can relate.”
We talked for a while until her mother called Bethany for dinner.
“Would you like to come over for dinner?” Bethany asked.
“As much as I would like to, and the Beast would delight at my absence, I still have to ask Beast if it’s okay.”
“That’s fine; come over and use the phone at my house.”
We approached her house to find her mother standing outside waiting for Bethany to return.
“Mom, this is Alexander, a friend from school. He lives just next door. Alex, this is Miss Lachlann, my mother.”
“Hello ma’am,” I said in greeting. “It’s nice to meet you.”
Miss. Lachlann replied with a smiled, “Likewise.”
I could hear Bethany informing her mother that I will be added to their dinner plans. As Bethany and I stood in the kitchen, Miss. Lachlann
looked as if she was getting ready to leave. Bethany pointed me to the phone and soon I was negotiating my release when I could hear
them argue about me. I hung up the phone and made my way out from the kitchen and to the hallway where they stood. Bethany was
upset and her mother was applying a few touch-ups to her make-up. They stopped abruptly when they noticed I was there with them.
“Well, I must leave you two here. Mr. Lachlann will be home soon, there is food on the stove, serve yourselves and drinks in the
refrigerator. Bethany, I will be home later.”
“Bethany! I need to speak with you over here.” Mrs. Lachlann added. “I must leave, but I don’t want him over here for too long, boys this
age are only into one thing and it’s very improper for you to be alone with this boy. I don’t care if he is a neighbor or not!” Mrs. Lachlann
said as I could hear them argue.
Bethany was about to add to the conversation but was cut short by her mother.
“Shush, I don’t want to hear another word of this, do I make myself clear?”
Mrs. Lachlann then looked at me and walked away. I stood quietly with Bethany in the hallway.
“God I hate her!” Bethany yelled into the air, then spoke, “are you ready to eat, because I am?!”
I followed her into the kitchen and she served my plate without a word. I knew exactly what they argued about, since her voice carried
through the hall unbeknown to them. We took our plates into the living room where she turned on the television. We talked a while and I
was left baffled by how Beast allowed me to leave for dinner. After some time I disrupted the silence in the room.
“If you don’t mind me asking?” I inquired. “Why were you two arguing with each other?”
Bethany took a moment before replying; she sighed then explained, “My mother had to leave, but she knows I hate staying in this house
by myself. She also thinks that all boys are bad for me. Why can’t she be a parent to me and not just analyzing me all the time, I hate
being the adult with all the responsibilities, but none of the perks. I don’t want to sound rude, but she did not approve of you coming over here with me when she’s gone. She thinks we may,” then Bethany giggled, “Do something?”
I followed with a smile, “What could we possibly do? Or maybe she thinks that I would strangle you to death as I watched from a mirror.
How absurd that seems! ”
I pondered on that remark as though the thought was a favorable bite that rolled around on my tongue savoring each moment. As she
laughed at my comment, I smiled back at her, thinking about how I would enjoy strangling her.
How tight would I have to hold the rope? How she would struggle, the tears, the reddening of her eyes, her questionable gaze of surprise
and shock. Her frantic heartbeat and bluing lips, and without notice I started breathing harder. That I slightly opened my mouth, my heart was beating fast, I was starting to show beads of sweat upon my forehead. Then I realized Bethany was watching me this entire time.
I desired the act of killing her even though I did not want to, yet the rush was overwhelming my sense of morality and logic. My vision
was starting to tunnel; I had to leave and soon before I committed to the act. To my surprise, I was taken by a kiss. Soft and a little firm it was pleasant, but unexpected. I withdrew after a few moments, this was not where I needed to be, and my mind was not in the right
moment for this.
“What was that for?” I asked withdrawing from her.
I had many reasons why I could not pursue her at this moment. I was still undecided about her character to name one, also I could never
reveal to her who I really am. She would never be prepared for something like this.
“I was curious mostly,” Bethany answered, blushing slightly. “I wanted to know how it felt, what it was like.”
“Could you have used someone else instead?”
“No, you’re the only boy I talk to at all.”
“Well, you were sweating; I just thought that you were nervous about kissing me too. You are very blunt, almost unnervingly rude. You are a jaded individual, yet all this together is most fascinating. I am surprised that you haven’t killed anyone yet.”
I stared at her with eyes filled with malcontent and dismay and I felt speechless. I could feel the blood race to my brain as my mind felt
like it was pulsating. I stood up and without a word I headed for the door, she called my name, but I did not respond to her. I wanted out of her house; I wanted nothing more to do with her. I left her waiting at the back porch.
Walking through the fields between our houses, I walked pass my own and kept walking still. I had a million things running through my
mind. I must distance myself from her before she knows too much about my life.
Why would she say these things?
Why would she do this to me?
Is this a game to her?
I physically wanted to kill her, to torture her, yet in my mind I could not. I really did not want to for at some level I respect her as she’s not like the other drones. As much as my body wanted to kill her, my mind wanted her alive and thus refused to give in to the act. I could go back, I still have time. Time enough to kill her; I desire to kill, I could slip my hands around her fragile white neck and slow her beating
heart. I could feel my rational mind slipping from me; I am losing control, I want to kill, I need to kill; but this is not the right time. I knelt down; deep in thought conflicting and unable to do much of anything else until I drew a conclusion, for the sake of my sanity I needed to do this at this moment.
At some time I had quieted the arguing thoughts that plagued my mind; I was drenched in sweat and shaking from the adrenaline surging through my body. The feeling lingered momentarily, but my mind was once again in control. I wiped the hair from my eyes, I was now
ready to head home and deal with Beast for that woman would have me suffer the world’s sins alone.
I entered through the sliding glass door inside the living room when I felt someone grab my hair from behind, it was Beast.
“Where have you been?” she demanded sharply before I could answer she finished her remark. “Bethany called over an hour ago wondering why you left so abruptly. She sounded worried, what did you do to her?”